Pastor Jim Bachmann, Senior Pastor
At what age should we expect young children to leave the nursery and attend “Big Church”? This was the subject of a recent staff discussion.
The Lord blessed Kristen and me with five children. Sundays were a challenge because I led in worship while she sang in the choir. Fortunately, Kristen taught our children reverence and respect from an early age. Many a Sunday our kids sat unattended on the pew for the entire service. Sometimes we asked another family to help. And when our firstborn was old enough we “deputized” her to maintain order among her siblings.
I appreciate parents who don’t want their children to disturb other worshipers. But most of the time those other worshipers are not nearly as disturbed as the parents fear. I also appreciate parents who recognize the cumulative value of having children in worship. We wanted our children to “breathe that air.” Over time the effect is powerful. Obviously, some of the service is “over the heads” of young children. But it is supposed to be that way! When our children are born they don’t understand our language. But we speak it to them anyway, and soon enough they start speaking it back to us.
I was raised on the pew. I was seldom excited, but I was always interested to watch my parents sing, pray, study, give, take communion, etc. Corporate worship was the place I saw my parents’ love for Jesus most clearly! John Piper once said, “The greatest stumbling block to children’s worship is parents who do not cherish … worship. They do not love it. Children can feel the difference between duty and delight. They know whether or not Dad loves being there.” He’s right. We cannot impart what we do not possess.
Having our children in worship counters the family fragmentation so prevalent today. In so doing we bring our young ones into a sacred place and awaken them to the majesty of God. Have you noticed that God doesn’t send “children’s thunder” or “children’s lightning” during a storm? He exposes them to His power and majesty! So should we.
I don’t know when your child should begin attending worship. Our staff recently made the decision to allow 4–year–olds to remain in our nursery if parents so desire. But every wise parent should yearn to have the family together in Big Church as soon as possible. Children learn many things even when they seem disinterested. One week it may be an anthem that stirs them, the next week a missionary’s testimony, and the next week a simple Scripture reading.
From an early age kids want to do “grown-up things.” Young sons want to shave and drive a car. Our daughters want to put on makeup and play “dress up.” Corporate worship is one “grown-up thing” our children can and should do with our full support. It may require some discipline before, during, or after the service. It may require a trip to the bathroom before the service. But out of 168 hours in each week, this one hour affords us the grand opportunity to model our love for Christ and expose our children to the powerful impact of corporate worship. So, start while they are young! As John Piper says, “It will probably be harder to acclimate a 12–year–old to a new worship service than a 5– or 6–year–old. The cement is much less wet, and vast possibilities of shaping the impulses of the heart are gone.”
Think about it. May God bless you and your children.
